Confessions

How do you feel when you wear makeup?

Did you feel good?

Did you feel pretty?

Does it make your confidence go from 0 to A1?

Now, why do you wear makeup?

Had I asked myself all these questions at the age of 13, I would have put the brush down and said “stop! You’re pretty just the way you are.” However, the truth is, not everyone sees me that way.

As an African American female that grew up overweight, it took a lot of courage to put the makeup brushes down, put the concealer and foundation away, break the eyebrow pencils, and toss the lipsticks in the trash.

Growing up, being called fat all the time, really affected me. Not only did my confidence diminish, but it also damaged my soul at a young age. Because I was overweight, it was always hard to find the right dress, or jeans or even a basic top. My only thing was being a tomboy. I loved sweatpants, and joggers and yoga pants! I would throw my hair in a bun, apply some makeup and call it a day. This was my outfit routine for the last 7-8 years of my life. The only thing that helped me feel okay inside was makeup.

In the month of February, I decided to go makeup free for one whole month. What did I discover? I found so much more time and energy that could be placed elsewhere. Every other morning I would look up a breakfast recipe and enjoy a great breakfast. Other days, I would take a walk down to RIO and have breakfast at a restaurant there. Recently, I’ve even found time to new reading material that really just makes my day amazing. Going without makeup was an interesting time, and I do it more often now because I have more time to do the things I didn’t think I would enjoy. Going makeup free was helpful because I found me.

Going makeup free helped me find the real me.

I couldn’t be happier.